playing twister with dog leashes

©bobbi plentovich lewis "imagine" falling creek elementary 2011 latex wall paint

       good afternoon campers......it's terrific tuesday!!!  how fabulous is that??!!....another day to do something amazing!......so i'm back to trying to streamline my art marketing, which kinda flows into my life in general too.....what??!!....my problem is, cause of the quarantine thing, i end up focusing on general life instead of doing my art......alas and alak.....what is alak?...let's look it up...pause ........and back......so first off alak is spelled alack....cause alak is a language spoken in southern laos or a beer.....i'm just getting yall ready for jeopardy.............so it seems...alack, or lack is regret or sadness...alas, or las is weariness ....and when you say them together and add the a....it's kinda like a sigh and then the word....so it comes out as a whole theatrical feeling of words...groovy......so i was wondering why there was a little black line under the word "sigh" and thinking this is different from my red lines under misspelled words, when looking closer realized it was dirt on my computer screen.......ha ha.....anyway back to alas and alack.....maybe more words should be said like that....ya know add a letter words.....so "a" means to sigh, maybe "w" means to add a wow like feeling in front......like w-amazing, or w-fantastic, maybe "gr" means an angry feeling kinda like a dog growling.....gr-why, gr-no......and then what if you combined all those to say something like....a-you, gr-see, w-llamas..... ha ha....try it,  it's an acting class online...ha ha ha......if you are at home doing this you're kids are probably thinking you've lost your mind....
         speaking of losing your mind...... the dog got a bath the other day....kada the great pyrennes.....she smelled so bad and i really put off giving her a bath....why you ask?....well cause she hates water....or more to the point, she hates to be put in water by someone other than herself......by herself she will run through water, play in water, etc......but if i make her do it, well, it's a standoff......i mean i stand kinda firm and she runs off.........so i usually take her somewhere to be groomed, but it's kinda pricey....and it's a challenge taking her there too....i had to tighten her collar, not choking, but just under that and then have the leash attached before i let her out of the back of the car, cause she will slip right out of her collar and run for the hills....tightening her collar is kinda like tightening a saddle on a horse....you think it's tight until the horse unbloats and you fall under the horse still in the saddle......that happened to the evil older sister once.....i was the one who tightened the saddle and sent her off......ha ha....i had to hide out from her for days till her evil wrath was over....it was worth it.........back to the dog.... even when i tighten her collar, there is so much hair there, that it's hard to tell where her neck really is.......so.... i get her out of the back of the car and then after i have been dragged all over the parking lot to the enjoyment of the grooming staff.....it's quite a show....i finally get her to the door, which is like trying to get a cat in a crate....ya know all 4 legs are stretched out with razor sharp claws grabbing on to anything so the cat won't go in the crate....so the grooming staff has the door opened, i'm dragging her through the door, she has 4 legs stretched out against the door jam,  when out of her collar she goes again, i'm launched into the groomers on top of the staff and off to the hills goes kada......good times....
            i tried one of those self serve dog baths at a pet store........well i had to climb into the bath to get her into it, and then i jumped  out and quickly turn on the water, where she launched herself over me and numerous terrified dog owners, ....who thanked their lucky stars they owned a chihuahua, ...with water spraying everywhere and a crazed dog tearing up the store.......soooo not allowed there anymore.....
           so with the help of my husband, we cornered her by means of 2 leashes and the deck and a fence on the other side and proceeded to turn on the water, which sent her into a frenzy.....while we had her kind of sequestered against the deck, i started pouring shampoo and scrubbing, which ended up mostly on myself and my husband and the cat, and hank the beagle, who doesn't know enough to get out of the rain so he was up in everyone's business cause , well,  why not..... it's hank the beagle.......so i'm trying to scrub her....of course i get the cat and hank the beagle too....the cat jumps to my back, which you might think, how nice the cats gonna give me a massage.....with claws......the dog has somehow houdinied herself under my husband and myself, it's like playing twister with dog leashes.....i try to hold her with my knees and  get a thorough rinse in....which by now shes laying under the deck in the mud...the cat is now a permanent fixture on my back, hank the beagle is under my legs wagging his tail, my husband is under the dog  under the deck in the mud,.....kada has the leashes stretched tight around us....we fear for our lives so we release her by cutting the leashes ......  and off she runs ........my husband has been tarred and feathered....well mudded and white furred..... i am covered in mud, soap, the infamous white dog hair, and a cat....hank the beagle looks pretty clean.....kada is off playing in water.......i think it went well......
           so alas and alack, the cat's off my back,
           the beagle is in a fine humour;
​           the bath's been completed, 10 stitches were needed,
           from now on we're back to the groomer.............................sweet streamlining heaven.......be groovy!

©bobbi plentovich lewis "playing twister with leashes" 2020 pen, ink and prismacolor 81/2" x 11"